Exposed

My Move Story

My Husband, before we moved, was the youth pastor at a church in CO. My husband LOVES the Lord. I mean LOVES!!! With everything he is and has, he loves God. When he first was asked to serve as the youth pastor we were SO excited. He knew his calling was to be in ministry and finally a door opened up.
Ok now fast forward 5 years later. When a person in the family is in ministry, it is expected that the whole family get in ministry. That is NOT the way it has to be…we didn’t know that then. Not only was my husband working normal office hours, but being a youth pastor I don’t think that senior leadership realized that youth pastoring happens outside of “normal” office hours because youth has school. Pile on top of that a man’s own family, and then on top of that, required after hour prayer meetings, required after hour conferences, evangelism outreaches that he was to be in charge of (after hours of course), required after hour…well you get the point. Not a lot of time left for those at home. Being a Pastor is hard.

So being a Pastors wife isn’t always the easiest thing in the world either. I’m just going to be real honest here because I can, and those of you that are Pastors wives or PK’s know what I mean. It’s not the fault of the Pastor. God called them into this type of work, ministry. But there are those people who watch with judgmental eyes waiting for you to mess up. Those with the “well because you are a pastors wife you should…” Man I would really like to tell them what they could do with their “should”, but being a Christian woman I will hold my tongue and lift it up in prayer :). Who are they to judge or tell me what I “should” Look like, speak like, dress like, act like, give me a freakin break! That is called false obligation and you do NOT have to live up to that, or even try to. Ok done with that rant for now.

I have heard it said that the more a man is involved in ministry, the more the woman disappears. Now that is not true in EVERY ministry for sure, but in this one it is, or was I should say, I wouldn’t know now. But that was my experience. So, because the job required so much of my husband and because I am a good wife and backed up my husband, I was working a full time job, and I was working a full time “volunteer job”, and I was a wife, and a mom. Whew! now that is a lot to handle. Not only that, but because of the job requirements of my husband, I was basically a single mom who happened to wear a wedding ring. Under the pressure of it all, the false obligation (you have to look like this…we expect your life to look like this… you can have this, but you can’t have that…) I cracked! My whole personality disappeared. I was a walking corpse. I mean really, I never stopped loving God, but in the whole thing of this eating away at my life, I didn’t know my husband anymore and he didn’t know me, I didn’t even know me! Actually, it wasn’t ok to be the “me” that I was, and I didn’t know how to be anything different. The pressure of raising kids by myself under the watchful demeaning eye of the religious Gestapo was just too much. Everything, the life inside of me, my thoughts and opinions, my spark…it all just died out. I was just animated skin and nothing more. The only thing that gave me life was when I was with my kids and “my kids” the youth group. They knew me and loved me and let me love them and that was all. It was so easy to regenerate there. But even that after 5 years of pouring out and “single parenting” and not living up to the standard of all of the “should’ers” whom my wonderful husband didn’t know, but by default he became one of, I left my husband, and I left ministry.

I am so sad to say it, and so hurt by that time. I left him with the purpose of never looking back at him, or ministry. In my thoughts I was leaving all the “should’ers”. All the expectation that I would never live up to, all the things that we were told had to be laid aside( God didn’t say it people did), All the confusion of feeling guilty for being lonely and angry that ministry was invading my time with my husband, all the not being able to ask questions because I should have already “known”, all the “you of all people should…” Leaving behind all the demeaning remarks for who I wasn’t, leaving it all behind, to walk into whatever hope there was of resurfacing the person under the burden of all of that crap. That is a whole other story in and of itself which I will get into one day which will include the wonderful people who reached in and pulled me out of the pile of crap that was laid upon me, and showed me Jesus…the real Jesus not the fake rule book one that held me prisoner for so long.

My husband is a Great Pastor. He is a Great Preacher too. One of the other things he is great at and is a hobby of his is fighting. He is an amazing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu fighter. But the fight to win me back was the fight of his life. Never has he had to fight with such force and never will he face another fight like that one. I won’t get into the details of that time, that is for me and my husband, but I will say that he won the fight, and I am wholeheartedly his, now and forever. Now for us and our marriage this was great and miraculous. God resurrected our marriage from death. He restored our union, and gave us new ground to stand on. We were free from religion and false obligation. But remember…there are still the “should’ers” that were at my husband’s workplace that were not on board with this whole thing. So what did we do? We prayed…hard. We cried out to God to deliver us out of that place and if it meant we quit ministry than we sadly would have, but, we cried, God if ministry is where you have truly called us let us work together in it and we will again try it, but this time honestly, Not with man’s law and ways but with your guidance, word, and love of people. And awesome God opened up a door for us.

When we moved from Co. I was super nervous. We had a house to sell in a down market. We had about a week before our kids would start school and I knew NOTHING about the school system, and I was leaving my family who had been my rock. My whole everything was connected to having family close by. And I was moving. We sold what we could and packed up the rest and moved into a host home. Our stuff is in a 2 car garage that they were so kind to offer us so we wouldn’t have to rent storage and here we would live until our house sold. Not only that but we were leaving that ministry and entering another with “church hurt”. To those that have had a church hurt you know how painful it is, and how incredibly scary it is to go back into the possibility of it. But if we are not hurtable how can we truly offer our whole hearts and honestly Love? That is another thing for another time also… But it was petrifying to face the possibility of another hurt like that.

When we were first hired into ministry (this was back in CO) we were told that we couldn’t have friends because friends wouldn’t respect our position as pastor. So we lived by that (which fed into my lonely times which were many). Well moving into a host home was incredibly scary as we were VERY private people. But the Wilders welcomed us in with open arms. Our house still hasn’t sold and it is almost a year later. We are still at the Wilders. Our stuff is still packed up in the garage. It has been hard to break the habit of not letting people close, but they have been so patient with us as we cautiously let them into our hearts and into our hurts. They were like a healing balm to us. They give us covering both physically and spiritually, They feed us both physically and spiritually. When Bart teaches my spirit feasts just like my mouth does when he smokes chicken YUM! And my talks with Barb not only help to sharpen my prophetic view, but also encourage and help build me into the woman that God is creating in me. It is EXCITING! I have never been this exposed or this excited in my life. It is both terrifying and liberating! We have made so many friends and it is wonderful. In fact I went out and did Kareoke with some of them this weekend and had a blast!

I love my life. God has used my own experiences in my hard times to help in ministering to others who are going through them ( Disclaimer- God did NOT make that time happen as he is NOT a child abuser, but He will not waste it either. I am willing to be exposed and let Him use it for His glory and He does. That is all.) And finding freedom in passing on living up to expectation of people, but rising up to what God has created in them.

My Husband is now a Sr. Pastor and we LOVE the place and People God has delivered us into. We walk out this life together with only His word as direction, no false obligation. We are fierce fighters against religion, and fierce fighters for relationship with Jesus. Our kids are growing healthy, happier and more free than I have ever seen them. God is so good!

So this move for me has been exposing, correcting, sharpening, liberating, loving, and probably the hardest and best thing I have ever been called on to do. When God calls he makes a way. The way may not always look like we think it is going to or want it to. But Gods way is the way that is going to call out the very essence of your entire being and call you to live in a way that honors the “you” that He created you to be. And by honoring the “you” you also Honor the God that created you.

I encourage you to live God’s way. Not the bound up path people tell you is God’s way, but get to know Him yourself and live for and with Him. He will change your life for the better. He will put the pieces into your life that you think are missing and guide you into a fulfilling existence. He will not shame or use shame to make you think one way or another, that is man’s tactic. God will love you with the most overwhelming love that you never knew you always wanted. God is Love. If you have experienced church hurt, than I encourage you to get in front of God and ask Him to guide you to a safe place to heal and a safe place to worship. Ask Him to lead you to a body of believers that will accept you and love you. Not love you despite your mistakes or habits or whatever, but including them! with the freedon to just love like God, to just love like Jesus, and to live in the power of the Holy Spirit!

Last night is going to go down in the books as one of the most memorable family nights for me. I can’t remember when we sat down together as a family and laughed so hard! We moved here a year ago and I don’t think that we have had a time like this in the whole year we have been here. Man O Man what a blast. We were eating a late dinner and just hanging out and I don’t even know what sparked it but we were talking about the “times when…”
The thing about it was I was there for a lot of these stories. I had witnessed them personally but hearing the experience through my kids’ eyes and in their words made it all new. Like the time I started the car and my son (then about 2 or 3) started crying…I thought the car noise scared him, turns out he was sitting in the back playing with buttons and he pressed something and thought he started the car, his next thought was aw crap mom is gonna kill me so he started crying. Or when I sent the kids out to walk the dogs and my daughter saw prairie dogs out in the fields so like any big sister she gave the leashes to her brother and once the dogs caught sight of the prairie dogs they dragged him several yard across the grass while she pointed and laughed at him and he couldn’t even scream he was too busy being dragged like Indiana Jones! Or when so-n-so waited at the top of the stairs only to fart in the face of the other one…Or when the girl thought she would be cool and lean out of her window to wave to a friend and she fell out of it onto some bushes! HAHAHA My kids were FULL of stories and we didn’t end up going to bed till past 11:00. I absolutely LOVED hearing all about them! When we were winding down my daughter said “mom you didn’t say much” and I laughed it off cause she was right I didn’t. not that I don’t have stories of my own, I just realized that I hadn’t really heard theirs
You get to be older and start to think, what do these kids know, they haven’t experienced…whatever. But that is SO not true. They have experienced plenty in their lives they just never get a chance to talk about it or tell it. At 11 years and 14 years old my kids have stories to tell about their experiences. And they are GREAT. We all were laughing so hard we were literally crying! We as a family in ministry are always out doing… We do things together, but we are always out doing. I forget to remember to check in and see in all of our doing what are we experiencing? To just sit at home and talk was the most refreshing thing I have been given in a long time. I know it was Fathers Day, but, I can’t help but think that it was a gift to me. To get to hear my kids stories, to get to hear their lives, to get to experience what they did through their eyes. I like how they see things. I realized that my kids are growing up. But it felt good to hear that the growing has been fun for them.
All you moms of tweens and teens, I encourage you to just start a “remember the time…” conversation with your kids, and then listen. Listen to what was going through their mind at the time. Listen to the things they don’t mind telling you now but if you found out then they were sure it would mean instant death. Kids are HILARIOUS! That night really was a bonding/uniting experience for us Vidals. I hope it is the same for you.

Cheating on God

I had a dream. Not the kind that leaves you excited to face your day when you wake up. Not the Cinderella kind where everything is peaceful and little birds and Forest critters come and attend to you like a princess. Nope. This was the kind where you wake up desperate to see if your husband/ wife is still there. The kind where your breathing is irregular, and it feels like someone roto-rootered a hole right in the place where your heart should be. It was that kind of dream, and I woke still feeling the pain.

In my dream I was standing on a platform with my kids and my husband. My wonderful husband was getting ready to go to work and I was seeing him off. We looked like the perfect “leave it to beaver” family. My husband patted the kid’s heads and kissed me on the cheek and left the platform. Once he walked away, other women came out to meet him. They were all very pretty. He would see them and embrace them. He would hold them and kiss them. Not the kind of kiss on the cheek he had given to me, but the kind that makes little girls sigh and long for the day someone loves them and kisses them with such fierce passion. I waited for him to come home watching the events of his day. I sat on the platform and waited. Patiently I waited for him to return to me. Even after I saw all that had gone on I still wanted him to come home to me and to kiss me with that kind of desire. But, when he came back to the platform, I stayed waiting and he kissed me on the cheek patted the kids on the head and went home.

When I woke up I had a heavy loneliness. The kind where you are right next to the one you love and they ignore your presence completely. Like a window in the room, you are right there but people only look through you not at you. solitary confinement in your own skin.

It was a model of the Church. God is waiting on the platform. But even though we are the bride of Christ, the spouse, we go out in the day and give the passionate part of ourselves to a world that doesn’t love us. How often do you miss going to service to corporately worship God to go camping, hunting, fishing, shopping, cleaning, bad day, whatever. I don’t mean making church a “religious” thing…”if I don’t go I’m going to hell!” NO NOTHING LIKE THAT!!! But how passionately are we pursuing God. How zealous are we to worship Him every chance we get. How adamantly do we run to him when our week is crap and we are tired. How willing are we to go into service to offer our gifts. Yes the preacher shares the word (that is the gift he/she has to offer) but your gift is NEEDED in the body. In corporate worship. If you take the Word seriously then you know 1 can chase 100 and 2 can chase 10,000. If your presence isn’t there than less are being chased. Not only that, but there is a blessing that happens in corporate worship that you don’t get alone. It’s God on the platform waiting for your passionate return. What a heavy lonliness He carries when we just give him a peck on the cheek, when He has promised His life, His everything to us and He is faithful to keep His promise. We, Church, are an unfaithful bride! Oh God please help our wondering hearts and eyes. Let them be turned back to You. To our first love. Let us not leave you lonely. God! I am sorry for not taking my commitment to you as seriously as you take your commitment to me. Help me to rise up and be the bride, wife, lover, passionate follower that you deserve.

Catch and Release

Mr. Wilder:Fish on!
Reply from class: Catch and release!

To any person who has been blessed enough to be taught by Mr. Bart Wilder. This is a common phrase heard in the classroom. But In the time I have shared space with the Wilder family I have come to learn that Fish on, Catch and release isn’t just what he says to get his class focused, these are the words Bart Wilder lives by.

Matthew 4:19
And He said to them, "Follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men."

Bart is an avid fisherman on the river but his skill there (though it is amazing) pales in comparison to the way he fishes for people. I don’t know what he uses on the lake, but while fishing for men Bart uses live bait. Taking lead from Jesus Bart uses himself. Whether it be bringing dinner to a young family just because he “thought they would like it”, purchasing an ipod for a teenage girl just to make her happy and feel welcome, watching Monty Python and the holy grail with a young man for the millionth time and STILL laughing just to spend time with him, or opening his home to any and everyone who needs a roof, a safe place, to hang out, etc… Through these acts of love, before you know it, BAM , you are caught.
Just like taking a snap shot with a prize fish, Bart will take a snapshot with you and let it imprint his heart. I have heard him mention students names (first and last) of students he has had more than 2 decades ago. I have been out in town with him where people who pass by make it a point to leave their present company to say “hi” to Mr. Wilder. It is a beautiful thing to enjoy these picture memories that they left each other with. It is a blessing to be creating my own. And then, at just the right time…the release.
Like a fish is released back into the water. Mr. Wilder will release you back into your natural habitat. Not the one you came directly from, but straight into the hands of a loving father God who created a place just for you. Through this impartation of himself, Bart shares a piece of Jesus with you and you are forever changed. I have seen the results of this catch and release with former students who are in their 20’s or 30’s and Stop by Bart’s house for a visit. I have seen the results in my own children who have taken up residence in the basement of Bart’s house. In this time they have both become more outgoing, and more confident. I am pretty sure it has something to do with knowing someone loves you and is on your side. I have seen it in my husband who takes Bart’s words, be they encouraging or correcting, and holds them as treasures and has let them help form him into the man he is becoming. A man I am so proud of. And I have seen it in myself, I have become more…just more. Everything I was has been sharpened and shined, polished and refined. I have been sent a truly selfless friend. I have seen in the flesh the kind of person I want to be like. I have heard Bart say that he just wants to make a difference. Bart, you have made a difference, and you continue to do so. I know God has a plan for my adventure here in WY. I know he put these Wilder friends in my life to help me along my way. My bible says God sent his one and only son to earth out of love for his people. I understand that the Son will take residence in the hearts of willing men. I believe he has and I am blessed because I personally know Jesus, I believe he likes to wear a Bart Suit.

Thank you Bart: for sharing your home, your treasure, your possessions, your talents, yourself, and for making us family.
We Love you! Happy Birthday!

Victory over Chaos

What a blur Thanksgiving was. It always seems to show up then end too fast. Since our move, life seems to go that way. Fast and furious. Moving my whole family, getting started in a new job, meeting new people, and basically just starting my life and my whole family’s life over again- whew! It can be overwhelming. All this while trying to maintain family time, being the best wife I can be, being the best mom I can be, being the best pastor I can be, being the best me I can be. I tell you it can REALLY spin a girl. I felt like I was starting get sucked into the tornado instead of remaining in the eye of the storm.

It’s funny to me that THAT was my idea of peace…the eye of the storm. The calm spot in the center of the tornado. The little island of bliss, where, if I am careful not to step too far to the right or left, I can be in complete harmony (sigh). I could enjoy the solitude of my little area of ecstasy. Ever been there? Just want that one place of peace in the middle of the chaos? Ever since I learned that there even was an eye to the storm I tried to live in it. It’s very stressful to try and stay there in the middle of craziness and to not get sucked into the insanity around you. I know I’m not alone in this.
Friends, I am not happy to admit, but I guess I’m relieved to admit, I was being ripped off! It was never God’s intention for me to dwell in the eye of the storm. I’m going to say that again. It was NEVER God’s intention for US to dwell in the eye of the storm but rather to not fear, or be bothered by, or even to just get rid of the storm all together.

Mark 4:39 (New Living Translation)
39 when Jesus woke up, he rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Silence! Be still!” Suddenly the wind stopped, and there was a great calm.

Yeah, life happens. Stuff happens. You see it on bumper stickers and t shirts all across the world in every language ca-ca happens. And we are surrounded by it. We get overwhelmed by all the to do lists, the job, the market for…whatever, the things I need to get, the things I need to get rid of and so on… you know your lists better than me. They build ominous waves around your little area of serenity and threaten to overtake you.

In the middle of this particular life threatening storm Jesus was asleep. HE WAS SLEEPING!!!! Which I took as his eyes were closed. I only think this because I sleep with my eyes closed. I don’t know if Jesus did or not but until he tells me otherwise, I am just going to assume he slept with his closed too. Why was this important to me? It was important because if my eyes are closed I cannot see the things that threaten me. Sure I can still hear and feel some effects, but what first feeds my attention is shut off. My eyes. I can focus my thoughts on other things. Not the things that threaten, but things that calm, things that relax, things that matter more than the stupid storm. I can visualize what is important and drive my heart toward that. I can then start to concentrate on my help instead of my helplessness. Once my focus is set, all other things follow suit. I start hearing the promises of my Father in Heaven who loves me. I can feel His embrace and His guidance and He walks me to my next place, I can breathe in His pure love for me and I am assured that I am taken care of. I am going to make it through this. I hold these things close to my heart and in the forefront of my mind and then I open my eyes. The waves of my to do’s and not done’s are there threatening me and I command them Peace be Still. I look at each task one at a time and I say I will live even if you don’t get done today, I will be happy even if you don’t get done today, I am loved and worthwhile even if you don’t get done today. You will NOT overtake me, my mind, my peace, or my joy. All that matters is taken care of.

Our storms are in fact storms, and they do rage, but I encourage you friends to face it like Jesus. With your eyes closed and your heart focused on His promises. Even if the end result doesn’t look like you thought it would, you still made it to the end! You still won! In the craziness of the Christmas to do’s I encourage you to close your eyes and focus on whats really important. Enjoy the time with your family, sing songs with them, watch a movie, relax with them. Take your focus off the things that aren’t done and put it on loving the person who is in front of you. Shut your eyes to your helplessness and listen for your help. Christmas will still come, whether that present you wanted to buy for so n so is under the tree or not. Let’s not sulk in what we didn’t do but rejoice in what He has done, is doing, and will continue to do. Let us focus on the gift of friends and family and love. Let us sing off key at the top of our lungs, let us live wildly and love recklessly and celebrate that Love came down and is with us still.

Take a hike

The night was crazy. Not in the good way either. Our event turned into something it shouldn’t have. What should have been vision casting turned into sulking about the past. It wasn’t ugly…but it wasn’t productive either. After the “funk” of that night, I needed to escape from the heaviness that was starting to build a haze around my heart.
I needed to run away to someplace, away from the craziness, away from the funk …just away, just quiet, just peace. A wonderful friend who could see the effects recommended we go to “the falls”. We made the drive to the parking area (about 5 minutes) parked and followed the trail. Along the way we met Scott and Little Abby his daughter who is 3 ½. We walked the rest of the 5 minute hike alongside them. Scott is a firefighter and told me that they are always rescuing people who climb up too high and then are afraid to come back down. Hahahaha that is funny! Who does that?!?!?! But I guess it happens. After some small talk he and Abby went on their way and Dave and I were left to check out the beauty of the falls. David went right up to it and looked straight up. Looking at the falls compared to David put everything back into perspective. God is God and I am not. THANK HIM!!!! In that moment I knew everything would be ok.
I made a small climb and for a while just sat. I sat in the shade and just enjoyed the silence of the place where I was at. I started to get cold so I climbed a little higher and sat on a rock that was actually pretty high up. Did I mention that I am deathly afraid of heights? Anyway, I sat on this rock and enjoyed the sun for a little bit. I started to feel uncomfortable so I decided to go to a little higher place on the rock that was more comfortable. Ahhhhh. It was like that part was designed to fit my butt perfectly! So there I sat on my rock and just let the sunshine kiss me. It felt so good. I was so proud of myself for climbing this high and conquering the rock. I was looking at the view from my rock and it was absolutely beautiful. The sun shining down, through the trees and right on my rock! I took a good look at my new perch. The moss that was growing on it, and the plants growing through it. I thanked God for putting it there. I know I am not the only one who has ever sat on this particular rock and parked there, but it was there for me to enjoy today. As I enjoyed it I spotted another rock that was just a little higher (not too much). It got better sun and sort of looked like a chair. It took me a few minutes to get up the courage, but I ended up climbing a little further up and sitting on the new rock for about another half hour and just enjoyed Gods presence. While I was looking up at the perfectly blue sky I noticed that there were other spots available. I wasn’t ready to make that climb that day, but I know it is there for me when I am.
We are all walking a some sort of a path. Sometimes we meet people along the way. Some are meant to stop and chat with and enjoy for a while. They share their stories with us. We share ours with them and then we part. Some will stay strangers. Some are forever by your side. There are times when we are being called higher, and so we climb. We climb to a new height (even if it IS a little scary). We have to be careful though, that while we are climbing we aren’t climbing too high. We need to know that the places we stepped are solid beneath us so that there is no fear of climbing down to help someone else up.
When we find a spot, it is ok to be comfortable in it, just realize we are on a hike. Although it may be a great resting spot it is not the end of the trek. If we end our voyage in the comfortable spot we will collect moss, we will collect junk, and even though my rock had life coming out of it in some places, it only grew through its cracks not by its climb, and the very places it actually had growth were the places that anchored it to its spot…forever. We are the same way. If we stop for too long things bolt on to us preventing us from movement, inhibiting us from our own growth and ultimately anchoring us into a spot where we are no longer resting but are paralyzed. So friends, I encourage you when the comfortable becomes uncomfortable, set your sights on higher ground, on better rocks, and find your place in the sun…or should I say the Son.
Thank you Jesus, for kissing me with your light, and showing me how to get to higher ground.

Storm under cover

I saw a storm behind the clouds the other night. It looked like a light show. There were purples and pinks and blues and whites. And they would flash in different places all over the sky. It was beautiful. I could tell by the thunder and bursts of light, that behind the clouds, the storm was raging! But from my point of view it was amazing. My thought was:

all who mourn in Israel,
he will give a crown of beauty for ashes,
a joyous blessing instead of mourning,
festive praise instead of despair.
In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks
that the Lord has planted for his own glory.

I wonder if from Gods point of view my life looks like that storm. This past year has been a real eye opener to say the least. The tempest was fierce! Everything that could be exposed -was, everything that could be shaken -was, everything that could break inside of a person-did in me. My life as I knew it was falling apart. My Marriage, family, friendships, ministry, everything! I never knew a person could hurt like that. I never knew a person could be completely emptied of everything they had, and everything they stood for, be completely broken, and still survive. There is only one way, Jesus. So as I clung to him he took me by the hand. He showed me where I was right, He showed me where I was wrong, and He showed me, it was time to quit pretending everything was o.k. and start living in reality.

The truth is- there are times when things are absolutely not ok. And that is ok as long as I am honest about it. I was not given “permission” to be honest in that way. I was told when we first started in ministry that basically, a family in ministry has to appear to be perfect at all times. They have to stay close to only each other. They can’t have friends outside of each other because people won’t respect the authority that they (as ministers) carry. That people would not receive us if they knew we didn’t have “everything together”. I was warned to not let anyone get too close. So to this- I say a healthy, hearty, THAT'S CRAP!

That is a false life! God is about relationship. To live under those conditions would be to reject relationships and deny God to really work in and through us. My marriage is not “perfect” in the way that we were pretending it to be, but now, it is perfect for us. We still fight, we still argue, but we don’t hide things, even when it hurts. That has opened doors to a whole new relationship that we never knew could be accessible on this earth. It has revealed a whole new love that is strong and unshakable and has united us as one - the way God meant it to be. My family is not “perfect”…but it’s mine. We like scary movies and trick or treating, we make fart jokes, we point and laugh at each other, and we live like normal people. The ministry is not “perfect”. We acknowledge the fact that we are broken people. We acknowledge the fact that we NEED God and we NEED each other. We are the hurting, the sinners, the throwaways, the successes, the unacceptable and the accepted. We are not perfect people. Just people who love the Lord. In our imperfection, God has promoted us and is moving us into a new season of life as ministers together. Not to live life behind closed doors, but to live life loud under His covering. And so the storms can rage, but under His covering it is not dangerous. It is a beautiful display of lights. His light, under His cover, amidst an epidemic of unpredictable, looking magnificent! That is my life!
I have beauty for ashes, Blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair, and we have been promoted and are being planted like an oak for the glory of God!